For the challenged cook (or the just plain challenged)...

This is a recipe I found from an old cook book published in the 40's:

Toast
Cut the bread in 1/2 inch slices. Brown evenly on both sides in a toaster, broiling oven, or oven.

Now if this seems intended for the simple minded, what about the warning labels on our food these days? I mean the really asinine ones. We all know what brought on the "Caution: Hot" warnings labels on our fast food coffee cups - the McDonald's lady who tried to drive with a cup of hot coffee in her crotch. Now my Kroger peanut butter was a caution label stating that it contains peanuts. In 2002, the single serving packs of planters peanuts even had a warning label on their package stating "Caution: Contains Peanuts". Well, Duh! I say we should leave the most obvious warning labels off the food and instead of suing the manufacturer of the offending product, think of it as a modern way for Mother Nature to cull the herds. Anyone that is stupid enough to do things like drive around with a hot beverage in their wazoo or eat peanut butter knowing they are allergic to peanuts should not be allowed to reproduce.
But if you think the warning on Pop Tarts not to toast pop tarts unattended is ridiculous - it's really not. I knew someone who banned frosted Pop Tarts from his house after one of them his son was toasting caught on fire and incinerated his toaster. I don't think I would have seen that one coming.

P.S. - Thanks for the cook book sis. There is some really cool recipes in here. Now time to experiment on the family. Bwahahaha!